HELLO EVERYONE!:)

HAHA.I have no plans for today and I'm dying of boredom,again and again.haha. However, I had an awesome time with my friends and family yesterday. I played basketball (after months of not playing it) at Setiawangsa. We talked a lot and lepak at mamak. I went back home after that, met my relatives and FAISAL.haih.Susah nak jumpa mamat ni.haha. Anyway,we watched paranormal activity 2 and from my opinion,it's not that scary compared to the first one.Of course,getting dragged from the staircase is creepy but it happened before in the first movie so yeah,not that much.hahahha.Qila is planning to do a movie marathon at her house,watching paranormal and I'm definitely looking forward :D gahhhh,I'm already missing you guys like crazy.hahahaha.bye.

OKAY.I'M OFFICIALLY NOT OKAY.THAT'S IT.

I've been trying to cover,acting as if everything seems perfectly happy while I'm dying on the inside.Haih.I feel like shit.Shitty shittttttt.

Okay,let's just be honest.Honesty is the best policy,right?LOL.

I miss you,I can't stop thinking about you,I miss your smile and I especially miss talking and laughing with you.

I miss your calls and texts.

Hey,I'm not even sure if there are still people who read my blog but whatever la.LOL.Today is indeed a boring day.I was dying of boredom.I woke up around 11.HAHA.I couldn't help it since I had nothing to do.I went for a jog,alone since nobody was at home.As I was about to come out from the gate,it started to rain and damn,it pissed me A LOT.I wanted to go inside but I went out anyway and jogged in the rain while listening to my ipod to keep me company.


So far,I'm still not okay but thankfully,they have been giving endless support to me,patiently listening to my confessions over and over again.HAHA.Thanks a lot,seriously.I do appreciate it.I wouldn't survive without all of you <3 People would be wondering why I'm suffering after the break-up although I asked for it.Well,it's none of your business.Breaking up does not stop someone from loving the other one.It's complicated.

I did two things that were not expected by my friends and surprisingly,myself.HAHA.After driving with Stepfather,I took a nap since I slept around 3.I couldn't sleep.The late nights are starting again.Too bad I can't go to parties or I would be having a great time already.LOL.Anyway,I baked a cake!I know,this is sooooo unexpected. -.- Mother asked me to do it.Since I canceled an outing with my friend,I decided to do it.It was fun actually.I'm definitely gonna do this baking thing again :D So yeah,when I'm a professional in baking (HAHA.PUH-LEASE), I will have to do tiramisu for my friend.Nasib la kau kwn aku,kalau tak,jgn harap la aku nak buatkan.Btw,aku akan tuntut eh!HAHA.Besides that,I went for jogging with Amy and Shahzuan.Thanks guys for accompanying me :D I really need a jog,I feel so fat now -.- I didn't eat.I don't feel hungry.The appetite is just not there.Honestly,I'm kinda happy in this situation.Yknow,not having the appetite to eat because I can burn those evil fats in my body faster than I expected.HAHA.Call me a crazy woman but I don't fucking care.
Bye :)

I'm not okay,not at all.Shit,I hate this :/

just let it go and move on.

As simple as that.HAHA.never weyh.I thought it would but that's just bullshit.No matter what,it remains in you.There's always a piece in my heart.

So yeah,I'm single.wow,it's definitely not easy to say that although I asked for it.It's complicated.He had done NOTHING WRONG.He's perfect for me but perfect seems to freak me out nowadays.I just don't know why.However,it's more about me.I'm currently having problems with myself.I'm not normal and I think I won't be at all.There was one point when I could finally say that 'I LOVE MYSELF.IT'S OKAY,I'M NOT AS PRETTY AS THE GIRLS OUT THERE,I'M NOT AS SKINNY AS THE GIRLS OUT THERE,I'M NOT AS GENIUS AS THE GIRLS OUT THERE.I HAVE ALLAH TO GUIDE ME TO THE RIGHT PATH'.

WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO YOU AIRINA?

I don't even know why.The depression is coming back and it's definitely haunting me.I blamed the eating disorders,broken families.HAHA.Come on Airina,you're being pathetic.

Moving on is definitely not easy but it's reality.you don't move on,you won't get what you want,especially in achieving your ultimate dream.I don't know why but I'm depressed. Mood swings are killing me faster than I thought.

I let go someone I knew so well,someone who was always there for me,someone who accepted me without any complaint,

and the most importantly,

someone who loved me more than I do.

Congrats Airina.

But I need time to think about myself. Blame me for being selfish and a jerk.I had to do it.I need to have a positive thinking. InsyaAllah,things will be better after this.

I still love you,after I asked for it,I'm starting to miss you but I'm holding back because it's not the right time.

I'M DONE WITH SPM!:D

I can't believe I'm actually done with it.Alhamdullilah,I made it through.OKAY,I cried once after add mathematics,thanks to my PMS.-.- Anyway,everything seems fine for now.I'm currently taking my driving lessons.I have to wake up early in the morning.HAHA.Damnnnnn,not what I had in mind though.LOL.I had to listen to this bloody long lecture.Hanya Allah tahu how SLEEPY I was during the lecture.I just couldn't stand the long talk.Any talk,actually.I would eventually close my eyes and fall into a deep sleep.HAHA.Well,fortunately,that didn't happen when I was listening to the lecture. I met someone from perfect score.Unfortunately,I didn't remember her name (I'M SORRY) but I do remember her face.She's pretty :) I met someone new,Jehan.She's from MRSM.Yeah,sume dok asrama. So,we suffered together.hahahaha.I guess that's all for now.I don't really have the mood to write long. I need to get the mood.Lol.Goodbye.